By now you may have noticed the recurrent theme of framing my articles with a question. Robert Kiyosaki, author of several books, including one of my favorites, Rich Dad, Poor Dad eloquently states, “A question opens the mind – a statement closes the mind”. It was a powerful insight that also revealed that not all questions are created equal. I leaned that I had to proactively examine the quality of the questions I was asking myself on a regular basis.
Ask and you shall receive
The mechanics of our brain is intricately designed to grant us what we desire. When we ask any question, it activates a part of our brain called the Reticular Activating System (RAS). RAS allows our brain to focus on the question you asked by eliminating the billions of unrelated stimuli in your environment that we experience through our physical senses. When you practice a skill such as meditation it is assisting RAS by narrowing your focus to find the answer.
Be impeccable with the power of your words
As you practice awareness in your daily life, you begin to embody what Don Miguel Ruiz refers to as the first agreement “Be impeccable with your words”. In his tiny but powerful book called The Four Agreements, he advises the reader to avoid using words to speak against oneself. Instead, use the power of your word to focus on truth and love.
Look at the examples of questions I share below and see where you habitually land when faced with a challenge.
| Disempowering | Empowering Reframe |
| Why can’t I do this? | How can I most easily make this work? |
| Why doesn’t anyone listen to me? | How can I communicate my needs more clearly? |
| What is wrong with me? | What happened that caused me to react this way? |
| Why can’t I ever lose weight? | What are some changes I can adopt to my diet? |
Everything happens for a reason
Yes, if we create the reason. Choosing one that empowers us to extract what we need to learn what is necessary and recalibrate back to our center more effortlessly. The next time you find yourself experiencing a painful situation that you can’t see your way out of, try on this question. It helped me when I was experiencing my own dark night of the soul after learning of my mother’s stage 4 lung cancer diagnosis and struggling to find a sweet spot in my career.
“If this situation does not change and would last forever, what qualities must I embody to have peace of mind?”. Michael B. Beckwith
Contemplating deep questions such as this can give way to self-remembrance to rediscover our true essence. Once I was able to internally develop the qualities of self-love and self-acceptance, I was able to shift my focus from what I wasn’t getting to what I needed to give to myself first.
Tamara Speid is a heart-centered revolutionary, guide, and experience artist devoted to empowering you to awaken from the mindset of struggle by experiencing a life filled with beauty. Follow Tamara on IG @thespeidexperience or visit her online at www.thespeidexperience.com.
